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Christmas

  1. Merry Christmas to my favorite coworker. You make going to work a little less awful
  1. You have such a pretty face, you should be on a Christmas card
  1. It's the most wonderful time of the year. Allegedly.
  1. This is the best secret santa gift you'll ever get
  1. New Year, Same Me
  1. Cookies aren't the only thing I put out for Santa
  1. December 25th
  1. The Elf is always watching
  1. Santa doesn't believe in you either
  1. What do santa & my wife have in common? They both only come once a year
  1. The only package I want for Christmas is yours
  1. Apple of my eye
  1. Meet me under the mistletoe
  1. Merry Xmas
  1. Have a holly jolly Christmas
  1. Hung like a stocking
  1. Santa, it's a long story
  1. Dear Santa I am nice until proven naughty
  1. Dear Santa, before I explain how much do you already know?
  1. The kitchen's fucking closed